If you're a regular reader, you know that I have a few default settings when it comes to how I judge movies. Like any human being I'm not always 100% consistent in my takes, as one, there are exceptions to every rule, and two, sometimes I just forget in the moment depending on how a … Continue reading A Shot Across Disney’s Bow – Ruby Gillman: Teenage Kraken
We're halfway through the year, and as we go into July, I have to say, things don't look half bad. While the major tentpole movies of the 2023 Blockbuster Season have largely fallen flat, on the whole the general output for mainstream media hasn't been all that terrible. Yes, Indiana Jones disappointed to an extreme … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – July 2023
When I was 12 years old, my family and I took a Spring Break vacation to Florida to go to Disney World. It was one of the greatest weeks of my life, and now that both my mother and the close family friend who was the impetus for the trip are gone, I hold on … Continue reading Old Man Yells at Klaus – Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny
One of the most enjoyable trends in recent cinema is the leitmotif of self-parody that also enhances the very tropes that are being aped. Perhaps the best examples are Knives Out and Glass Onion, which send up the conventions of the whodunit while creating genuinely ingenious whodunits. But it's not limited to just that one … Continue reading Game Night – The Blackening
Back in 2006, filmmaker M. Night Shyamalan released what is arguably his worst movie, Lady in the Water. Derided for being incredibly self-indulgent, the project was rightly lambasted for Shyamalan's sanctimonious take on art, writing, and criticism, in which he essentially staged a cinematic hissy fit due to negative reactions to his previous work. He … Continue reading The Play’s the Thing – Asteroid City
Despite the fact that Elemental is the third straight Pixar film to have its trailer earn a place in the monthly TFINYW column, I went into it as I do every entry from this studio, with the hope that it'll dazzle the eyes, fill them with tears, and leave the audience breathless with a combination … Continue reading Happy Father’s Day! Here’s 10,000 Dad Jokes Instead of a Plot! – Elemental
For anyone who has been shivering with anticipation over this review, I do apologize for its lateness. The long-awaited follow-up to the Oscar-winning Into the Spider-Verse was certainly one of the most anticipated releases for the year, and its critical and box office reception shows that it did not disappoint. However, it did take me … Continue reading The Tangled Web – Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse
I've pretty much always conducted myself as an adult with the philosophy of being honest. My basic litmus test is that I only lie if the benefits of doing so significantly outweigh the consequences of getting caught. This applies to things ranging from how I'd approach a reality show like Survivor or Big Brother to … Continue reading The Best Policy – You Hurt My Feelings
Apologies one and all for the lack of content over the past two weeks. It's an unfortunate side effect of Summer Blockbuster season sometimes. There are the odd weeks where the major studios will essentially get out of each others' way and let one film dominate the box office for a cycle. Two weeks ago … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – June 2023
In this month's edition of TFINYW, I was excited to declare Fool's Paradise as the "Redemption Reel," as it appeared to potentially be the only shred of quality in a weekend filled to the brim with the artistic and cinematic equivalent of rancid feces. And I was right about the output itself, which averages only … Continue reading Better to Remain Silent – Fool’s Paradise
I Actually Paid To See This 