Through his first two films - The Witch and the criminally underrated The Lighthouse - Robert Eggers has already proven himself to be an absolute master at setting mood, atmosphere, and tone. His careful eye for production design, combined with his uncanny ability to draw out the most intense performances possible from his actors, has … Continue reading Valhalla, I Am Coming – The Northman
The calendar has finally turned over, and of course, because we just can't have nice things, the universe decided to take Betty White out at the last fucking minute. But anyway, the official book has closed on 2021, a year where we almost, kinda, sort of got back to something resembling normal, only for the … Continue reading The Best (and Worst) of 2021
Edgar Wright has already given us one cinematic triumph this year in the form of the fantastic music documentary, The Sparks Brothers, which at times served as a distillation of his expertise in crafting movies around a catalog soundtrack. Truly there are few filmmakers out there able to make a narrative work hand-in-hand with era-appropriate … Continue reading Through the Looking Glass – Last Night in Soho
For the purposes of legal protection, I will say upfront that I can't prove that the 90+ members of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association are bribed for their votes at the Golden Globes. It is merely an opinion, mostly presented tongue-in-cheek, based on the history of truly baffling nominations and awards that repeatedly smack of … Continue reading Here’s Some Money, Please Validate Me! – 78th Golden Globe Nominees Announced
Let's just state the plain and honest truth. 2020 was the shittiest year any of us have experienced. Everything closed, Donald Trump tried to lead an insurrection, and 1 out of every 1,000 Americans died from a virus that could have been mitigated - if not contained - if we had a competent government response … Continue reading The Best (and Worst) of 2020, Way After the Fact
Jane Austen's novel, "Emma," has been adapted four times for the big screen. In 1996, a straight-up version gave Gwyneth Paltrow one of her first leading roles, and won the Oscar for Original Score. In 2010, India gave us Aisha, which was a modest success overseas. Of course, the first, and most famous version of the … Continue reading Newness Beats Clueless – Emma.
Hooray, this shitty year is almost in the books! We've endured four god awful Disney remakes plus a sequel to a previous one! We've survived Jennifer Lopez in her natural state as a stripper! Somehow we've even made it past Donald Trump's head photoshopped onto Rocky Balboa and HIS CAMPAIGN TRYING TO SAY IT'S A … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – December 2019
M. Night Shyamalan has come full circle over the last 20 years. He was an instant success with The Sixth Sense, a solid box office machine with Unbreakable and Signs, a Hollywood in-joke after The Village, then poison for a decade with horrible film after horrible film. Then he started to evolve and get his mojo back with The Visit, … Continue reading I’m Campy, Thanks for Asking! – Glass
I saw 111 new films in 2018 between the theatre and streaming services. Eleventy-one movies, eleventy-one reviews, either stand-alone or in groups. Eleventy-one chances to thrill, to laugh, to cry, and to outright despise. It's been a hell of a run this first year, and we're still not done. There are still plenty of movies … Continue reading The Best (and Worst) of 2018
One of the greatest black comedies in cinematic history is 1988's Heathers. From the "corn nuts" death scenes to Christian Slater blowing himself up outside a pep rally, it's one of the funniest looks at the extremes of teenage life ever depicted on film. It's also one that Hollywood could probably never get away with again, … Continue reading When Gilmore Girls Go Bad – Thoroughbreds
I Actually Paid To See This 