I have to say, as we approach Thanksgiving, there are years where it gets really hard to find anything for which to be thankful, because what the sentiment actually means is an acknowledgement of the good things in your life. This has been an incredibly difficult year for my family and me. We've suffered a … Continue reading This Film Is Not Yet Watchable – November 2025
If there's a positive way to spin the events of this year to date, it would be to consider 2025 to be about facing new challenges and persevering. After 13 months without work, I have today completed my training period for my new job, and the powers that be have decided to keep me on. … Continue reading This Film Is Not Yet Watchable – October 2025
You may be wondering why this month's column is coming out so late, nine whole days into January. Well, there are three reasons. The first is that, right after Christmas, I got a stye in my left eye. Despite multiple attempts to pop and/or drain it, the thing got so big that my eye was … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – January 2025
Yes, folks, you read that right. Part. One! For the first time ever, I am forced to split the monthly preview parodying into two installments. I have to do this for three reasons. One is that I just wrapped up a show I've been working on for the last six months (keep an eye out … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – August 2024, Part One
The Year of Our Lord of the Rings Two Thousand and Twenty-three is almost in the books, and quite frankly, I'm relieved. This has been one of the more difficult years in my life, not the least of which because my mother died and I'm dead flat broke. But also, it just feels like this … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – December 2023
It's official. As of this month, I will join the growing ranks of old men yelling at clouds, for later this August, I will turn 40. It is, if I'm being completely honest, a day I thought I'd never see, and to a small extent, I kind of wish that were the case. I don't … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – August 2022
We're officially 1/4 of the way through the year! WOO! I guess. Anyway, now that the Oscar Blitz is complete and the book has been fully closed on 2021 (the Razzies even recanted their "prize" to Bruce Willis after he announced he had aphasia - but weirdly they didn't take back their "Redeemer" award for … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – April 2022
Tomorrow's the big day when the Academy finally makes their announcement for this year's Oscar nominations. But as happens every year, the Golden Raspberry Awards get to go on "Oscar Eve" as the Academy's self-described "ugly cousin," highlighting the absolute worst Hollywood had to offer in the previous year. For the third year running, I … Continue reading The Bruce Willis Show – 42nd Razzie Nominations!
Ah February, such a wonderful time of the year. A season of love, a time of reflection on racial history, and also, horror movies... somehow. Yeah, I don't know if you've ever noticed, but the second month on the calendar tends to be the testing ground for the year in cinematic terror. Even though October … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – February 2022
Top o'the mornin' ta ye! It's yer friendly neighborhood Irish back row film fanatic idiot. And yes, I'm totally actually Irish, and I have the tattoos to prove it. No, I don't have the DNA tests to prove it, because I absolutely dread the idea of potentially having to alter/remove my tattoos if I'm wrong. … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – March 2020
I Actually Paid To See This 