You may be wondering why this month's column is coming out so late, nine whole days into January. Well, there are three reasons. The first is that, right after Christmas, I got a stye in my left eye. Despite multiple attempts to pop and/or drain it, the thing got so big that my eye was … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – January 2025
A couple of weeks ago, I took a nasty fall. At least, it was nasty for someone my age. While going out to get some lunch, I ran into a couple of problems. The first was that the restaurant completely flubbed my order by giving me a ton of fries I didn't ask for. I … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – October 2024
I think it's safe to say that this has not been a great year for movies thus far. I know the better stuff tends to be backloaded into the latter half of the calendar, particularly during the fall and early winter for Awards Season, but 2024 has noticeably been on the underwhelming side. Normally by … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – June 2024
The beginning of October marks the official start of "Spooky Season," where we all celebrate the things that give us just the right kinds of scares. It's also the start of "Knockoff Month," where we all roll our eyes and laugh at the cheap imitations of things that are supposed to be worthwhile. Yes, whether … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – October 2023
I'd say it's kind of hard to believe that we're already halfway through the year, but I understand how calendars work, so it's not like it's a surprise or anything. That said, the last several weeks have been exceedingly busy, so it does feel like time has flowed a bit faster than normal, especially when … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – July 2022
We're officially 1/4 of the way through the year! WOO! I guess. Anyway, now that the Oscar Blitz is complete and the book has been fully closed on 2021 (the Razzies even recanted their "prize" to Bruce Willis after he announced he had aphasia - but weirdly they didn't take back their "Redeemer" award for … Continue reading This Film is Not Yet Watchable – April 2022
Tomorrow's the big day when the Academy finally makes their announcement for this year's Oscar nominations. But as happens every year, the Golden Raspberry Awards get to go on "Oscar Eve" as the Academy's self-described "ugly cousin," highlighting the absolute worst Hollywood had to offer in the previous year. For the third year running, I … Continue reading The Bruce Willis Show – 42nd Razzie Nominations!
I Actually Paid To See This 